What can you get for $15?

Standing in the lineup on the stairs waiting to get into The Only Gay Club In The Village last night I over heard three women got nuts about the $15 cover-charge. For this back water town, that's steep, I agree, and only three weeks ago it was only $10, but this is The Only Gay Club In The Village so you've gotta pay for it, I guess. Plus, it's the only place in town that has a show. Usually the show is a great laugh, full of fat drag queens, tiny twinks and that weird looking chick who gives me the creeps. I was going to be paying my $15 regardless, but the fact the club sponsored a couple of local fire fighters for the latest Fireman's Calendar, and those boys were making their stage debut during this night's show sold it for me. Only $15? Take my money.

Strategically positioning myself directly below the main pole, I had prime viewing once the show began. First off the usual performers doing their trademark stuff; lip-syncing to crap Top 40 music and barely clothed boys writhing about the floor pretending to make out together (I'm sure their girlfriends are either proud of them or are doing likewise with each other in a dark corner somewhere). That's worth 50c of my $15.

Then the firemen arrive to save the day. I recognise The Hot One right away, seeing as he's been on all the promotional material (more on him later). Three of them, fully kitted out in their usual life saving attire. Now, I'm no connoisseur of strip shows, but I thought the idea was to work the crowd and build the anticipation, not walk straight out and drop your pants? Never mind, I was directly under it so happy days. One guy was older, with a well calved body though married, the second guy is obviously less enthusiastic about his appearance and the crowd responded accordingly, then comes The Hot One, mid 20s, rock hard abs, huge arms and great chest but ... he's short. Doesn't matter, I'm sitting down, so it looks good from here. So, with the boys on stage in only their newly printed Fireman's Calendar 2007 underwear I'm thinking my $15 is almost well spent, then I notice it, as does everyone else; The Hot One has a small, but VERY noticeable wet spot on his underwear, right there, right on the end of his bulge; pre cum! HA! He's standing there in all his glory, arms raised, grinning from ear to ear, strutting around for everyone to enjoy, and the only thing anyone has their eyes on is his wet spot that's slowly getting bigger.

I feel ashamed I only paid $15.

Anyway, the best part of all of this is the background story of this guy. I admit I don't know him personally, but he bugs me. There is a copy of the said calendar in our house (not mine) and I was slowly and meticulously browsing it the other day when I realised that The Hot One not only appears on the centrefold, but he's also the person attributed with organising, promoting and distributing the thing. How does that work? Good on him for raising money for whatever charity they're supporting (obviously I paid attention to that part didn't I), but the critic in me tells me this dude is just found the easiest way to get pictures of himself, half naked, on everyone's coffee table, office wall and on stage at the local gay club, all in the name of a good cause. Half his luck I guess. Anyway, like I said, he's short, and I'm Height Arrogant. But insanely jealous.

Edit: Look what I just found!